The head of the Computer Science department

The head of the Computer Science department at UCL is a guy named Anthony Finkelstein. He has the same last name as me, so every time I see his name in one of my classes, or I get an email from him, I am somewhat startled. I’m not accustomed to seeing my name show up everywhere.

Jeffrey goes to the UCL doctor

[Jeffrey walks in to an empty waiting room. He is excited by the prospect of not waiting to see a doctor.]

Jeffrey: I’d like to see a doctor, and am excited about the prospect of not waiting. I was in last Thursday for the first time…

Reception: I’m sorry, you’ll have to come back during walk-in hours.

Jeffrey: When are walk-in hours?

Reception: 9:30 to 10:30 and 2:30 to 3:30.

[Jeffrey checks watch. It is 10:40.]

Jeffrey: …Oh.

Reception: Ah, I remember you; I should have given this to you last time you were in here.

[Reception hands Jeffrey a sheet of information about the practice, including walk-in hours.]

Jeffrey: …Thanks.

Jeremy Who?

Jeremy Bentham is a philosopher famous for his role in the establishment of utilitarianism (“the greatest good for the greatest number of people”, etc.). Bentham also had some influence in the founding of University College London (UCL; the university at which I am currently studying), to which he bequeathed his auto-icon:

Jeremy Bentham

The preserved body of the man is supposedly beneath those clothes. It’s probably mostly just a skeleton by now. Oh, and the real preserved head of Jeremy Bentham is locked away somewhere, that one on display is just a wax replica. It had to be hidden away because students from King’s College London, with whom UCL has a standing rivalry, stole it and played soccer with it. It’s on Wikipedia, so it must be true. Those bastards.

The doors to his wooden box are open during the day, so that you can go hang out with him if you so desire, and it’s in a very central building on campus, so it’s quite accessible. I say hello whenever I pass by. At night, when the doors to his box are closed, I can only assume that the ghost of Jeremy Bentham, yearning to be free, leaves his auto-icon, flies around London, and feasts on the flesh of the living.

I know what I’m being for Halloween…

I presume by know that you are as enthralled by Jeremy Bentham as I am. So now, I hereby issue my formal proposal for the mascot of University College London to be…The Fighting Benthams! Slightly cooler than Tufts University’s Jumbos, slightly less cool than Dartmouth College’s Keggy the Keg. Nothing is more intimidating than a philosopher and social reformer ready to kick some ass.

If you’re with me, throw your hands up.